In fact, it was downright uncomfortable to read about a wealthy, older man dominating a naive, younger woman in such a visceral, sexual way. So what would make a woman willingly enter the BDSM world? ‘The lesson to take away there is not to “date”, but to date from an affinity group. ‘There’s every chance your friends know them and it’s common to ask someone’s ex what they’re like.’ ‘You can’t go into any dating community with a sense of frenzy. ‘You can’t assume because you’re all into the same thing – whether that’s books, running or S&M – you’ll match.
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